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Wednesday, July 7, 2010


Right now, I'm sad. Many months ago, Cindi and I went to the Adventure Science Center in Nashville. I had a BLAST. My instant reaction was, "I have to bring the kids". I sent an e-mail to my mom and sister listing the activities I wanted to do with the kids (i.e., my sister's children) while they were in town. My sister grabbed hold of this science museum and wanted to go too. Fine. Instead of going up on a Thursday and staying with Cindi like planned, I'd drive up on a Friday and make it all a one day trip. They're be 2-3 drivers so it'd be fine. Then my cousin wanted to go so it'd be a second car but 3-5 drivers so okay. My cousin dropped out a week ago. Okay, fine, plans continued with my sister. She signed up for a class that means she'll get to Memphis a day later than originally planned. Therefore, she'll meet us in Nashville. That makes me the only driver but okay, we'll be in it together (actually, there'd be 3 drivers between 2 cars). A wrench was thrown into it all due to a family activity locally. I gave my sister control over how that was handled because she had so far to drive already. I didn't think she'd be up for driving from NC, stopping at a science museum, then coming to Memphis for an event. She agreed (without me sharing my opinion). Tonight (Wednesday), she tells me she's not going to meet us in Nashville at the science museum after all. Great. I've rearranged my schedule and plan for the kids based on her desire to go to this museum and now she's backing out AND going to the family event making me look like the selfish one for not working it all out in my schedule. Thanks, Sis. The cherry on top? Cindi backed out too. As of a few days ago even, she was going to meet us at the museum and play. Now, she's only coming if they have a new exhibit she wants to see. I'm all alone. Me and the kids. Me and fibromyalgia. Me and my car that keeps cutting off. Me.

I'm frustrated with my life at large; this is just one more piece interplaying with all of the other bullshit, tiring, frustrating pieces.

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