My body is failing me. Whenever I bend over, I have extreme pain in my calf muscles. Can you imagine how it feels not to have the strength and energy to bend over to turn on the water hose? Yesterday, I got off the phone with Tammy around 9pm (my resolve not to speak to her at all lasted less than 2 days) and instantly went to sleep. Silly me, apparently already sleepy enough not to fully execute the sense that I have, thought that if I laid there, even if I drifted to sleep, I would wake up during the night and shower. Has anyone not told me that A.J. can sleep like a mofo? 6:30am, the alarm went off, I growled as I still wasn't ready to wake up. 7ish, I was out of the bed and moving around to get ready for work. I knew I'd be late today. I pulled off at 7:45, which means I was in my office by 8. Wow.
At work today, I had a realization about why I don't like to exercise.... I don't get better. When I was in undergrad, I exercised and over time was able to lift more weight and walk faster than before over time. Now, every day is like day 1. For the first time ever, it occurred to me that maybe that's not my fault. Do others with fibro notice this inability, or great difficulty, to grow and push further in their exercise? One of my current goals is to walk 30 minutes at 4.0 (i.e., 2 miles in 30 minutes). I inched up my walk speed .1 yesterday, something I've been debating on my ability to do. I've been barely hanging on as is. I'm a weakling.
In other news, a man that talks to himself while he works fixed my washer and dryer today. My mom bought them from my cousins moving to Vegas but they have been like a migraine since they got to my house a little over a week ago. They were hooked up. I put in vinegar and water as a test/clean cycle and went to my "gym" to try my new-to-me treadmill. When I came up for water in the middle of the workout, I found my laundry room, kitchen, and part of my living room flooded. Damn. Money will be paid out for damage. I tried to fix things where the washer wouldn't leak but nothing that I tried worked. Refusing to go unnoticed, teh dryer arrived with a 4-prong ending, but my wall can only take 3. I went to Lowe's to find out how to remedy the situation and returned home with a 3-prong cord. My landlord had someone change out the cords while he was hear checking out the ruined copy and the message that I was sent was, "it doesn't work". I don't know what that means. I threw some of my towels wet from mopping up the floor into it and they dried. Eventually, I looked for help with my units. I called that liar, Shane, that installed my previous washer and dryer. I offered to miss work to suit his schedule. He told me he'd come Friday evening; he never came, called, or texted. Monday, I went through the phone book looking for help and there I found my Talks to Himself Angel. AAA would have also fixed it but it would have cost twice as much as I paid. I've done a test run-- no water in my floor. Praises Be!
Other exciting news: I have the DHEA of a 85 year old and my cortisol levels are shot. I think that means I'm sleepy, depressed, and incapable of handling stress. Also, perhaps I have cold hands and feet, low blood pressure, and some other things that don't sound like me. Another term: adrenal fatigue. That's why I took the saliva test that reported this data in the first place. I'm taking vitamin C and a B complex vitamin to treat this but don't know for sure that my body absorbs vitamins yet. No wonder I'm so darn tired. A funny? I feel much worse now than I did when I took the test but my DHEA barely registered on my testing date. Let's visualize where my level is now-- unless there's little variation in DHEA readings.
Having the fibro monster win and boss me around is a daunting thought. I'll respond to it now by eating popcorn. Ciao!
The Diet/Beauty Industry Cycle of Dis-Empowerment - I had the honor of being part of the Summer of Body Love event last weekend. It was an honor to share the stage with Virgie Tovar, Naomi Finklestein and I...
22 hours ago