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Thursday, May 19, 2011

This week has been one of those periods where I feel like a failure and disgrace in so many ways. I've been so tired that I've lived in a constant brain fog the past few days. I've been so sleepy that I haven't cleaned or exercised all week. But I did watch American Idol. How funny is that? Yesterday, I came home and napped. I set the alarm for 6:50 so I could watch American Idol. I've become quite the avid viewer these past fews week but surprisingly have little preference concerning who wins. I think I reached my limit last night when the pain started to seep away from my body as I lay and sought sleep. Maybe it's true that God doesn't give you more than you can handle. I still think I was a poor choice for fibromyalgia but at least I get breaks being the weak kid. Today, things were better. I'm not 100% but I'm so much better than I was. I still don't trust my body. A co-worker told me about a $10 walking wine tour but I fear what trying something like that would do to me right now. I cleaned for 30 minutes but felt my energy wane so I found other ways to be productive and satisfied. I've gotten rid of 3 items since my last stuff reduction note.

Upcoming plans:
- Spend way too much in Memphis over the next 6 weeks. I go this week for a doctor's appointment. I have a training there the second weekend in June, Father's Day is the week after that, and then comes my birthday. I love my Tammy. I love my family. I don't love the drive. I've been so f* up that 5 hour energy isn't even upping me for the 80 min ride.

Umm, that's it for tonight. So much in my heart but so little to actually say.

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